Of all the chores that go along with home ownership, unclogging the sink drain has got to be one of the most disgusting there is. Having to pull the drain pipes apart and get that nasty, hairy, gooey, junk all over your hands is just plain gross. But the other day when our bathroom sink backed-up, I didn’t complain about it at all because quite frankly, I had seen it coming. It was a great reminder that “Love Must Keep The Sink Drain Clean“.
Sometimes marriage is a lot like the clogged sink drain, in that you take for granted that the sink is going to function properly each and every day. Then, one morning you wake up and realize that you’ve failed to do the work of keeping all the little things from clogging it up. Before you know it, you’ve got a real mess on your hands!
The most successful marriages that I know of are the ones where both the husband and wife embody Christ-like characteristics that help to “keep the sink drain clean”. This past Sunday at New Song Church, we talked about the importance of having a “WEiRD Marriage”. “WEiRD” meaning that it’s the opposite of what “normal” people usually do in a relationship. If you’d like to listen to the message from Sunday’s service in it’s entirety, just CLICK HERE. Otherwise, here are a few characteristics of a “WEiRD Marriage” that we talked about:
- WEiRD marriages take work! You must be INTENTIONAL about INVESTING in the relationship with your spouse. If you want to have a great marriage, then you must do what is necessary to feed, nurture, and care for it. It doesn’t “just happen” on it’s own.
- A WEiRD marriage embodies honor. Honor is a heart-attitude. Honor does not go in just one direction, it’s 360 degrees: honor up, honor down, honor all around. In Romans 12:10, the Apostle Paul says, “Love each other with genuine affection, and take delight in honoring each other.” It’s important to note that if you have to demand honor, then you are probably not at a point where you are worthy to receive it. True honor comes from a place of humility, which is what compels us to serve one another.
- A WEiRD marriage isn’t transactional. There’s no, “I did “this” for you, so now you need to do “this” for me!” That’s entitlement, not humility. 1 Corinthians 13:5 reminds us that love doesn’t keep score. It’s not about what we get…it’s about what we give.
- A WEiRD marriage practices full disclosure. Keeping secrets from one another is dangerous because it inhibits true authenticity. When you are transparent in your marriage, it gives your mate the chance to love the “REAL” you-the same applies to your relationship with God.
- A WEiRD marriage means friends first, lovers second. Song of Solomon 6:16 says, “This is my beloved, and this is my friend.” When your friendship is thriving, your love-making will thrive, too. In marriage, if your focus is more on sex than on friendship, then true intimacy diminishes and your connection to one another weakens. If you work on your friendship first, rarely will you have to work on your love-making!
So, what’s your marriage look like? Does it embody the components of a WEiRD marriage, or is it “normal” just like everyone else’s? Maybe a better way to put it is, “Are you doing what it takes to keep the sink drain clean?”
Think about it.
*A special thanks to lifechurch.tv for allowing us the privilege of using the “WEiRD” concept! You guys are killin’ it for the Kingdom!