In one of my earlier posts, Social Media And Porn: Using One But Not The Other, I mentioned the fact that I used to have a Facebook page. Honestly, I rather enjoyed “The Facebook” (reference intended for those of you who saw “The Social Network”). But after a while, I started feeling the need to do away with it…for lots of reasons.
First of all, it really did take up a lot of my time, and secondly, I have lots of other forms of communication to keep up with. I needed to streamline. I was hearing comments like, “Well, I sent you a message on Facebook…didn’t you get it?” Or, “How come you haven’t accepted my friend request?” Or, my favorite, “How come you’re not on Farmville?“
Next, I found that giving too much info about my family life was not always the best thing to do. Periodically, people would walk up to my wife and kids and ask them really invasive questions about things we had done, or places we had been. Like it or not, the tension that you face when you’re in leadership is that you live in a proverbial “glass house”. I am in no way complaining, it’s just the fact of the matter.
And the final reason that I gave up Facebook was because old girlfriends would contact me…and frankly, I have no desire to talk to old flames, because I’ve got the hottest flame on the planet! (Love you @Karri_Rogers)
When I had my FB page, occasionally I would need to “unfriend” someone. It would happen for various reasons, but the underlying principle was always the same advice that my wife and I constantly give our two children, “Show me your friends and I’ll show you your future.” (not sure where that saying originally came from, but props to my BFF Marty for always teaching that to the students in his youth group-that’s what his mom taught him)
Recently, we had to “unfriend” someone on our church’s Facebook page. We were in no way trying to be the “Jesus Police“, but the person was repeatedly posting inappropriate status updates (that were vulgar and sexual), along with off-color photos that were degrading to women…plus they were a Duke fan! (ok, just kidding about the Duke thing…well, kind of :-))
Maybe you’re asking, “What are the reasons that I should “unfriend” someone?” Here are a few:
1. They continually post stuff that you would be embarrassed to show your Grandma or Jesus
2. You find yourself spending way too much time and energy obsessing over their status updates
3. You’re constantly irritated by their passive-agressive comments
4. They initiate dialogue, either on your wall or in a private message, that is “over the line”
5. Your instinct tells you to
So, are you tired of getting annoyed and offended with certain individuals every time you see their post on your Facebook wall? Are you tired of getting sucked into the “gossip trail” of other people’s comments? Well, stop wasting your time, and stop spending negative energy…just click the “unfriend button”. Who cares if they find out? Maybe, just maybe, it will give you an opportunity to exercise some fortitude and speak the truth, in love, to them.
Think about it.